Archive | Darling Original Artwork

I’m Gay

When I was eight years old, I wrote my first poem. I remember the moment the words came to me. I was lying in bed at night, the lines rattling through my brain, startling sleep away. I turned on my pencil-shaped bedside lamp, grabbed my pink diary and huddled up underneath the little roses on my wallpaper to scribble the words down before they were lost to me forever. I re-read them over and over, letting them seep into my mind as I drifted off to sleep, so full of mystery and fascination at this new craft that had opened up to me.

The next day, I showed the poem to my mother. It was a love poem, and the only thing she said was, “Why is this written to a woman?”

I didn’t know. (more…)

Continue Reading

Come stand on the blank page with me

I am not ashamed of getting divorced. Divorce has been a winnowing experience for me.

First, I cleared physical clutter from my life, giving up things that I did not need in order to stay close to my girls. I budgeted carefully, gave up my car and simplified my spending habits so that I could stay home.

Then I cleared out emotional clutter, letting go of relationships with people who did not believe in me. I was told to get a real job or to stop homeschooling or to parent differently. I was told that everything bad that was happening to me was my fault.

But there were other people, people who stood by me, and I couldn’t have made it through this year without their support. (more…)

Continue Reading

Stop And Smell The Flowers

This winter I started meditating regularly. You would think it’s a practice of slowness, but my mind is naturally so busy that even in meditation I feel busy, wandering, mind unraveling and winding up and unspooling again and again. I tend to be so busy, so active, constantly picking and prodding each experiece and thought to analyze it and weigh it and understand it. But, over time, meditation has helped me to slow down, to just “be” more, to cultivate a light inside of me burried deep within. This essence of “being” has been growing under the surface… or at least my awareness of it has. (more…)

Continue Reading